I recently came across a vacancy here. Wow, math. Diffures, diffraction, optics, numerical methods, convolutions! I have forgotten everything for a long time, I didn’t know something, from my work experience there are completely different things, but let me, I think, click, I’m sorry or something, what the hell is not joking.
They call, they say - hello, you sent us your resume here, and did you notice that the position is for a novice programmer? Well, I say, I noticed, but I have never done such things as yours, but in terms of salary - if, say, X, is that okay? Yes, they say, it's a shit question, let's arrange a Skype interview.
Well, I think they'll blow me apart now. They always do it. I asked so bluntly - I’m actually ah-ahh-tiny, and you’re probably looking for a big and fat one, right? But no, it turned out that it was kind of normal. - True? Truly I tell you: I am an average programmer, not an ace of clubs. - Calm down, everything is fine, it is not the gods who burn the pots. - And nothing, that I am thirty-nine, and I have a beard? - Nothing. Well, they told me about their wonderful world of computational optics, and I told them a little about myself, roughly like they liked each other, they called me for a confrontation. So, I say, tell me, in programming, I understand myself, but in mathematics you have something there, otherwise I have forgotten everything for a long time without preparation, - Goodbye, Toronto! - but if with, then maybe what I can. Well, they say, we have here, in principle, a ruler, numerical methods, diffura, urchp,functional analysis there is any, where without it, well, Fourier transforms, convolutions. Mom dear, I think, but I say - yes, yes, great, thanks, see you later.
And then I got a bomb. First of all, this is how fucking cool! Return to the tasks of dashing youth! And secondly, how the hell would you order to update your memory a little less than the entire university course in a week? Higher mathematics for former students-now-dummies in one week - where to find such a book, lecture, podcast? Let's use the hint "call a mathematician relative". - Listen, - says the stepfather, a living person is probably needed here. - Yes, I agree, perhaps. But, you know, this is the case here, I’ve already talked about politics with all your former students, so they don’t count. - Yes, I understand. Okay, let's find someone without Facebook. And he left to look. Meanwhile, I myself am doing everything that I can (work? What kind of work, one that is not a wolf?) I found, then, a tutor. Well, how is a tutor? So, a knowledgeable person. We sat with him and remembered all sorts of theorems.There was a moment when I directly felt that so familiar compression of spirit, when a person speaks, and suddenly you do not understand anything, and well, you cannot do anything. It’s like when a cyclist who is not yet exhausted miraculously attacks you on the rise, but you simply cannot go faster, and you just look at his retreating T-shirt. Because of this compression, one might say, I do not work at the university. Maybe if it wasn't so sting ... fig, in general, knows. I still have a dozen pieces of paper covered with writing and plans to repeat the chiki-bryk on Wednesday, talk about difura and partial derivatives, but somehow it did not come to that, I seem to have decided further on my own, all by myself, always by myself. Maybe if not for all this myself, I would now work at the university, like all normal people. But okay, let's go. In short, I come, and there.and suddenly you don't understand anything, and well, you can't do anything. It’s like when a cyclist who is not yet exhausted miraculously attacks you on the rise, but you simply cannot go faster, and you just look at his retreating T-shirt. Because of this compression, one might say, I do not work at the university. Maybe if it wasn't so sting ... fig, in general, knows. I still have a dozen pieces of paper covered with writing and plans to repeat the chiki-bryk on Wednesday, talk about difura and partial derivatives, but somehow it didn't come to that, I seem to have decided further on my own, all by myself, all always by myself. Maybe if not for all this myself, I would now work at the university, like all normal people. But okay, let's go. In short, I come, and there.and suddenly you don't understand anything, and well, you can't do anything. It’s like when a cyclist who is not yet exhausted miraculously attacks you on the rise, but you simply cannot go faster, and you just look at his retreating T-shirt. Because of this compression, one might say, I do not work at the university. Maybe if it wasn't so sting ... fig, in general, knows. I still have a dozen pieces of paper covered with writing and plans to repeat the chiki-bryk on Wednesday, talk about difura and partial derivatives, but somehow it did not come to that, I seem to have decided further on my own, all by myself, always by myself. Maybe if not for all this myself, I would now work at the university, like all normal people. But okay, let's go. In short, I come, and there.and you just look at his shirt receding. Because of this compression, one might say, I do not work at the university. Maybe if it wasn't so sting ... fig, in general, knows. I still have a dozen pieces of paper covered with writing and plans to repeat the chiki-bryk on Wednesday, talk about difura and partial derivatives, but somehow it did not come to that, I seem to have decided further on my own, all by myself, always by myself. Maybe if not for all this myself, I would now work at the university, like all normal people. But okay, let's go. In short, I come, and there.and you just look at his shirt receding. Because of this compression, one might say, I do not work at the university. Maybe if it wasn't so sting ... fig, in general, knows. I still have a dozen pieces of paper covered with writing and plans to repeat the chiki-bryk on Wednesday, talk about difura and partial derivatives, but somehow it did not come to that, I seem to have decided further on my own, all by myself, always by myself. Maybe if not for all this myself, I would now work at the university, like all normal people. But okay, let's go. In short, I come, and there.everything is always myself. Maybe if not for all this myself, I would now work at the university, like all normal people. But okay, let's go. In short, I come, and there.everything is always myself. Maybe if not for all this myself, I would now work at the university, like all normal people. But okay, let's go. In short, I come, and there.
, . ... , . , . : , . , "" , "". ", ". , 88- ( " ". , — ? .) 15 — , , , , , . , .
, , — . , , — . , . — , , : , , , . , . , . , . .
— , ? , ? , ? ? , ? , , , . , , . , , ( , , , , -, , ). ? , , - , , , . , - . ? , , , , , , .
— , . . - - , , , — - .
. , .
— , , — . — , , , , - , .
— ?
. . - - . ---..., . , — ---... , Im, dim, Ker, , , - . . , , . . , , , , . — , , ( , ). (, ). ---... — , ? — . ? , . , A((x1 + x2)/2) . . , , — , . , , , , ( , , ). - , , , ..-.., , , , , , , , .
— . , : , .
. . .
— , ... ? ---...
, . , , . . ? , , , , , . : — , — , — .
Then they asked me a little about diffraction, it seemed like he knew. Actually, according to the code, it was quite simple there, which did not prevent me from getting stupid for quite a long time closer to the "three o'clock" mark. I decided with tips, but, it seems, without obvious blunders.
We said goodbye, discussing who finished what and where, and that the Jews were not allowed to Mehmat before, and instead studied at Kerosinka (they were surprised, I was surprised that they were surprised). Today I got the answer:
>>>
Good afternoon, Denis!
We are forced to refuse you, because we believe that your qualifications are higher than our position suggests.
Thank you for your interest and your time!
>>>
Hmm. I shouldn't have told them about the toilet cubicles. I thought it would.